I’ve become scared

I think I realized that hanging out with people who are so different from who you are is that I’ve gotten more scared of doing things. Things I usually wouldn’t hesitate to do, I know hesitate. I wonder, will people judge me? Sometimes I just do it before I get the chance to think about it, so that by the time I think about it, I’ve already done it. I’ve never been the kind of person that did things to get recognition from others, I mainly did things that I thought was the right thing for myself, which tended to align with what society thought was appropriate in a way. I think it’s important to challenge yourself, but what happens when you are not forced to do anything anymore. It scares me more than having a busy schedule.

Maybe everyone is just always conscious of themselves, but my mind has been in dramaland for so long that I forgot about the real world.

I haven’t written something legitimate for so long that it’s hard to come up with content to write about, even if it’s just my thoughts.

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Late Night Posts

It’s a bit past 4am where I am right now and I feel anything but sleepy. March is coming to a close, and soon we will be welcoming back the bugs that came along with the warmer weather. I feel kind of sad, but mostly glad, that the temperature is finally returning and that school is coming to an end. I guess the thing I like best about blogging is that the purpose of each post is as much as you make it. I like how I have free reign over what I’m writing, how I’m able to control the words on the page and freely post this on a platform where anyone with the website title can read. This month has been a handful: super busy, but somehow keeping everything in check. College really matures you and makes you think in a different perspective and sometimes I wonder if I would be any different if I didn’t experience the things that I did in college. I wonder if I would be more willing to take risks and less afraid of what other people thought of me. College really makes you aware and self-conscious; it’s like that first time you come out of the cozy shell you’ve called home for the past 18 or so years, and faced living life straight on, with no support or help.

I don’t even know what I’m writing about…just a rant in the midst of exams, problem sets, and a heap of other stuff.

xoxo,

dramaqueensoph

Songs I’m Listening To: Febuary 2017

 

I kind of want to do a monthly favorite music post from now on, because I think it’ll be interesting to see what came out and when.

  • In this month, Red Velvet released their new, “red” concept single titled Rookie. It is kind of weird when you first listen to it, but I can imagine it becoming another one of those songs that will get stuck in your head for a long time. (Update: I like this song a lot.)
  • I am still listening to Yes No Maybe by Suzy, which I really enjoy. Sadly, the rest of Korea doesn’t feel the same. Still really like Pretend a lot! I feel like I can relate to it the more I listen to it.
  • Also, still listening to the Goblin drama OST, because it’s so good! I feel like I’m in a movie when I listen to it. Love Stay With Me especially, and getting a little bit tired of the other songs at the moment.
  • Got into a Zion.T sort of phase; just mainly listening to his music while doing homework since I feel like I have barely enough time to do anything else. 🙂 It’s nice and relaxing. He also released OO, his new album, late January or early February I believe.
  • Love Is More Than Separation by Soyou and Junggigo. I actually like this song better than Some these days, because I haven’t heard it as much and I like the harmonies of their voices together.
  • So My First and Last by my current favorite boy “group”, NCT Dream, came out today (February 8th) and I love it so much!! It’s so happy and the music video is so quality.
  • Not K-pop, but I’ve been getting into TFBoys, especially since they remind me of NCT dream. Their songs are so peppy and a change from the normal Korean music that I always listen to.
  • Aliee’s song for the drama Goblin, I Will Go to You Like the First Snow, was really nice this month! When I felt overwhelmed or just tired from the day, I could just slowly walk back to my dorm listening to this song.
  • Taeyeon also came out with an album this month, but I haven’t gotten the chance to give it a proper listen, so I will have to do that sometime. Her single, Fine, isn’t really my jam at the moment, but I might grow to like it after a couple proper listens.
  • TWICE and BTS both came out this month, which was met with a lot of hype. I think these groups will really represent the trends of K-pop for a couple more years to come. Their songs Knock Knock and Not Today, respectively, are pretty good. I really liked Knock Knock at the first listen, but now that I’m learning the dance to it, I’m starting to like it less and less…And sadly I’m not a huge BTS fan.
  • I almost forgot about Soyou’s and Baekhyun’s duet, Rain. I was really anticipating this song! But sadly the chorus was a bit weird and something was missing in my opinion. Would still listen to this song though.
  • The last song I’ve been listening to is not a song that was recently released. It’s Jessica’s That Person, You. A friend from my Korean class suggested that song to me and I could really relate to the lyrics.

Anyway, that’s pretty much it for the month of Feburary 2017! I actually really enjoyed doing this because I saw how long the month really was and how many songs were released that I enjoyed. I was actually surprised because I thought the month went by so quickly, but so many great songs were released. Anyway, hopefully I’ll be able to continue this series of “what is currently coming out/songs that I am currently enjoying”.

xoxo,

dramaqueensoph

 

On: Sitting in class

“Art washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life. “

-Pablo Picasso

Sometimes I sit in class and wonder if I’m even really sitting in class, grasping material, and doing assignments. I feel like I am so overwhelmed this semester with all of the classes I have to take and all the assignments they give out. On the bright side, I drink coffee a lot more these days.

I guess if you take a step back from all the work you have to do, it makes you wonder why you made your body get up at 8 in the morning, just to sit and listen to an old guy talk about words on a screen. If you can’t tell, I’m sitting in physics lecture, and the lecturer’s voice is sort of zoning out to the background; he’s currently talking about a styrofoam ball with sticks on it. I’m really confused and bored by the fact that our physics teacher keeps trying to show us stuff; I really need to start reading the textbook.

College really makes you a different person from the type of person. In high school I had so much time to waste on nonproductive things like YouTube and Dramafever.

Now my life feels like a train wreck. When your life feels like it’s falling apart, I sometimes like to think about it in another way. Think about your life as a story that has already been written and is just waiting for you to live it. When thinking from that third person point of view, it makes me feel more at ease (totally stole this from drama Another Oh Haeyoung).

This post was inspired by physics lecture and 2am desires to not shower. Never imagined how busy I would get these days.

xoxo,

dramaqueensoph

flaws

Currently just another Friday after a barrage of assignments throughout the week. Too tired to even find a quote, maybe I’ll make my own today.

“Just keep going, only if you keep going will you be able to surpass your limit.”

-dramaqueensoph

So yeah, I’m pretty lazy right now because I have so much to get done and definitely not enough time. Going to try to relax for a bit, but meanwhile, here is a completely irrelevant post. I think it’s important to point out one’s flaws because if you don’t see them, then you can’t improve upon them.

I didn’t really think about my flaws until college because recently I’ve been regretting a lot of things I’ve been doing.

-brags too much (I feel like I got better at writing, but actually it was just in comparison to my 8th-grade self …)
-talks too loud (especially during times I shouldn’t be)
-forgetful
-wishy-washy (can’t really decide)
-makes things more dramatic/awkward than they need to be
-bad mindset sometimes
-doesn’t think much before talking, and regrets a lot afterwards
-don’t know when the line is crossed

good aspects
-relatively good at judging others
-kind, mannerly
-modest
-honest (relatively)
-funny (at least, to myself)
good aspects of myself from others:
-energetic
-bubbly
-hardworking
-pragmatic
-cooperative
-logical
-optimistic

I was kind of surprised that the few people I asked pointed out that I was enthusiastic when I feel very dead in college. It makes me feel happy that I can possibly make others feel energized as well.

I feel like I’ve compiled this list partially out of embarrassment and partially out of the need to improve on the aspects that aren’t positive. I feel like in college I’ve regretted a lot of things that have happened, but I haven’t had the time to regret upon those enough.

 

Here’s another quote relating to the music I’m currently listening to!

“Let’s not get sick” -Zion.T

Currently listening to Zion.T to study and it’s pretty efficient! I love his music, how it’s laid back, but lets the listener bop to the beat at the same time.

xoxo,

dramaqueensoph

 

Coming Off Across As

Do you ever feel like you come across as someone different than you imagine yourself to be?

To hide my insecurities about how smart everyone is and how I need a ton of help from others just to do something, I feel like I push opportunities away. I know I just need to study and work hard, but that’s all I’m doing right now and nothing is working out for me. I don’t know if I should just ignore the situation or address it, but I feel like my life is simply too busy to sort anything out at the moment. I guess I never really realized how much of a mess my life was in until in physics I just started crying for no reason. I don’t know how my life got to this point in only one short week, but I tried to get involved on campus, and my course load has gotten much more difficult. I feel like everyone around me is doing fine and getting all their stuff done, while I’m just sitting here, suffering and not knowing what to do.

I feel like life is a test, a test of whether you can stand the challenges put up against you and survive. In a drama I watched in the past, Another Oh Hae-young, the quote “if you survive, you win,” was said by the male lead. Although this quote isn’t an ultimatum, I think it is very true when it comes to situations that are so hard and confusing that make you mentally lost.

xoxo,

dramaqueensoph

Rounding Off January

“You must do the things you think you cannot do.”

-Eleanor Roosevelt

I’ve always looked to quotes for life motivation, but I thought of including them in the beginning from now on, to just remind me of some good quotes out there. This quote by Eleanor Roosevelt really gives me the energy to do things that I think I can’t possibly do, but I test myself to my limits and when I do the task in the end, I feel so proud of myself. Quotes like this give me motivation to go on with my day with my own type of flair.

Even though this month-long venture has taken a lot of physical effort out of me, I am still glad for it because I was able to finish a lot of posts that were just left hanging and basically crank out a lot of other topics that could decide the path of my blog entries. Although it was a lot of work and planning, it was honestly super fun writing on this blog regularly and coming up with good topics to write on. It would be fun to have these kinds of short moments of activity and I was always grateful for having a place to put my thoughts about things that mattered to me the most.

Although I’m not sure if I did actually make it to 25 posts this month, I know for sure that there will be 20, which is quite a lot in my book. Pretty proud of myself for coming so far and surviving college again. Somehow after being home for so long during the break, I am missing home much more. Maybe it’s because I had to ride on the plane there alone.

Anyway, still watching a couple of dramas actually. I think I’m going to stick to the ones that are currently airing, although I might get a couple episodes behind with school work and other work. I am hoping that I will be posting more frequently; I am currently thinking about posting once a week on Fridays, and making this blog a regular, fun thing to do after a long week of class, but we’ll see. I might have to combine a couple weeks worth to actually have something decent. Hopefully I’ll be writing again soon!

xoxo,

dramaqueensoph

Chinese New Year 2017

“Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time.”

-Thomas Edison

I find that this quote really resonates with me when I’m going through a rough patch, knowing that there is light in the tunnel and if you don’t see the light, there’s still more to go.

I realized I never came up with specific goals for myself for the new year, so I decided to post this around the Chinese New Year season. 🙂

  1. Be a better person
  2. Take more risks
  3. Become a better writer
  4. Be a better communicator
  5. Love the moment

 

xoxo,

dramaqueensoph

Good Study Tips

Recently I’ve tried to take some notes on how to be a better student. Here are some of the main points I took away from that:

  1. Be mindful of your goals [with my desire to be able to take Korean for at least two years, I have to work hard and succeed in my required classes]
  2. Review your notes
  3. Read the textbook out loud and summarize what you’ve read
  4. Plan your weeks and DO IT
  5. Prioritize your activities
  6. Find a good place to study (that will also give you sufficient exercise! i.e. walking to the library)
  7. Find motivation (this leads back to #1)
  8. Have spaced repetition

Some tips when studying:

  1. Stand up (when studying) and move around more
  2. Reward yourself (from time to time!!!)
  3. Sit near a window
  4. Do a headstand (or put your head below your heart)
  5. Watch a YouTube video if you get stuck

Here are my super colorful and beautiful notes 🙂

Learning Korean TAG

This is a super fun tag started from Hangukdrama, a blogger that I really look up to. Even though the post is a bit old, I wanted to do it on my blog, so I’m going to do it. I challenge everyone else who is learning Korean because it’s fun for you to personally see what motivates you to learn Korean. Even if you aren’t learning Korean, I hope this motivates you to learn Korean, or any other language you’ve been putting off.

Here is her original post: http://www.hangukdrama.com/21-question-tag-the-korean-learner-version/

 

1. Why Korean?

Korean dramas had a deep impact on my life. It sounds lame, but it really did. I wrote a blog post about this called How KDramas Changed My Life.

2 . Daum or Naver (dictionary I mean)?

I don’t really have a preference, but do I have the Naver dictionary on my phone.

3. First website that you visit every day?

Netizenbuzz.

4. Best thing that happened to you? (related to learning Korean)

Being able to meet other people who are learning Korean at school.

5. Ever regretted learning Korean?

Nope, only wish I could learn it faster.

6. Most common feedback/question you get when you say you are learning Korean?

“Why are you learning Korean?” I feel like this question is often said with a hint of disdain.

7. First Korean food that comes to your mind?

Kimchi.

8. Most overrated Korean drama?

Descendants of the Sun. Still liked it a lot though. Wrote plenty of episode reviews for the drama.

9. Most underrated Korean drama?

The Master’s Sun!! Also wrote a posted called Why I Love The Master’s Sun. The first two and last paragraphs are spoiler-free, but the others have spoilers so I would stay away and watch the drama first! hehe

10.Latest milestone in learning Korean?

Writing a journal in Korean every day? I can introduce myself in Korean and attempt to use the honorific form.

11. Favorite Korean word / phrase?

에라 모르겠다 It’s a Big Bang song 😉

12. Name 3 people (fictional / real) who motivate / influence your Korean learning journey

Jung Eun-ji, Yoo Jae-suk, Song Joong-ki

People I want to meet that have inspired me to learn the language.

13. Secret ambition / goal (relating to Korean)

Meet Song Joong-ki and act in a drama with him (like Fatima in Descendants of the Sun). Or just becoming an actress in Korea works too.

14. I want to sound like _____ when I speak Korean

Choi Yoo-jung.

15. Best compliment received (for Korean)

“You sound like a native Korean!” -from a native Korean (when I sang Into the New World)

16. When is the last time you sat down and study Korean?

Last semester. I tried to study on my own, but I have little motivation to do so. I find it hard to motivate myself unless I am forced to (by the school and my peers).

17. Favorite textbook?

I’ve only gone through one Korean textbook haha.

18. Special people you met (online or otherwise) through Korean?

The most supportive people in class.

19. How has learning Korean changed you / your life? 

It helped my GPA, it made me happier, and it gave me irreplaceable relationships with people.

20. Ever dreamt in Korean?

Yes. After watching Heirs I think. I dreamed that Lee Min-ho was carrying me through a hay maze. I spoke Korean and the people understood me even though I had no clue as to what I was saying (this was before I started learning Korean).

21. Single best thing about learning Korean?

Being able to write simple sentences in Korean and also being able to use sing in Korean (I use Everysing soo much now).

————-

xoxo,

dramaqueensoph